Coffee Talk
by Doctor Emmit Brown
Summary: Ranma runs into (literaly) a guy who seems to have had very similar experiences in love and survived. A short oneshot.


See if you can't guess whom Ranma is talking to before I tell you.

* * *

"So how'd you meet her?" 

"Heh, it was the absolute worst way possible. She walked in on me in the bath!"

"No way! I met Akane the same way!"

"Hah! I'll bet she doesn't hit as hard as mine did!"

"I'll take that bet!"

We were talking amicably in the coffee shop this stranger and I. I had been running after Happosai, trying to prevent another panty raid when I quite literally ran into him. I was impressed that he managed to survive the impact (and the road rash he experienced as he skidded along the pavement at high speed), so I figured the least I could do was to buy this guy a coffee as an apology. We got to talking, and somehow managed to fall on the subject of the women in our lives.

"I swear Ranma, every time I even looked at her wrong, she'd think I was doing something perverted and punch me into next week."

My jaw throbbed in sympathy, as I remembered the countless times Akane had done the same to me. "I feel your pain brother," I said.

"Oh it gets worse," he replied. "She would get really jealous if some other pretty girl looked at me wrong. It was worse that some of them were actually after me as well!"

Again I cringed at the similarity. If this guy hadn't been five or so years older than me, I'd swear he was my long lost twin or something. I had to ask, "So what changed?"

He smiled at me from behind his wire-frame glasses. "Well, I'm not entirely sure anything changed at all. She still hits me from time to time if she thinks I deserve it, but the kissing makes up for it." _And the sex! _Well, he didn't actually say that last part, but I could tell by the look in his face that he was certainly thinking it. "Somewhere along the line though, the 'bakas' took on a more playful meaning rather than hurtful, and she didn't hit me for absolutely everything. It was about a year before I got into Todai that I felt that I might love her. It took a year for me to finally admit it to her, and another 6 months before she admitted she loved me too."

He was staring off into space now, remembering his journey. I sat waiting patiently for him to snap out of it. I already knew how the story ended of course; his wedding band glittered brightly in the light. He was subconsciously playing with it with his other hand, and I could see that it hadn't even left a mark on his finger yet. I took the moment of silence to contemplate my own relationship with Akane. It was eerily similar to his with his wife, and while part of me hoped that maybe the rest would be different, another part of me wanted to know how he managed to pull it off, and get her to marry him.

When he came out of his reminiscing, I asked him, "So, how'd you do it?"

"Do what?"

Suddenly embarrassed, I turned my head and mumbled. "Get her to marry you?"

He smirked. "Why? You thinking of trying to catch your own firecracker?"

"Me and that uncute tomboy? Yeah right!" I puffed up my chest in defiance, but somehow he saw through my act. He smirked again.

"Whatever Ranma. It just kinda happened really. We had spent so much time together studying and doing all sorts of other stuff, that it was inevitable. Somehow, we managed to escape the distractions of home (even if it wasn't intentional), and I asked her. She said yes. All the other girls decided that they wanted my friendship more than loosing me altogether and bowed out gracefully. Although, not without a fight on a giant zeppelin…"

I didn't bother to ask about the zeppelin part. Stranger stuff had happened to me, so I figured it could happen to anyone. Again I thought of Akane.

He looked down into his cup and noticed it was empty. "Well, thanks for the coffee Ranma. I have to get back home soon. Naru just found out she was pregnant a while ago, and she's been rather miserable with morning sickness."

"Hey congrats Keitaro! Hope you two have a healthy baby!"

"Will you be fine getting back to Nerima? Kanagawa is kinda far from there."

"Yeah, I can make it home in time for dinner if I really hoof it. And Keitaro, thanks."

"For what?"

"For… just thanks."

Keitaro smiled at me as if he knew what I was talking about. "Any time Ranma."

* * *

"Hey Akane, can we talk?" 

End

* * *

I came up with this idea while in bed the other night while reading Love Hina for the umpteenth time. The idea came way out of left field, especially since I usually hate crossovers, but this one seemed to work. It never occurred to me before, but Ranma and Akane's relationship is almost _exactly the same_ as Keitaro and Naru's relationship. Kinda makes me wonder if Akamatsu is a closet Takahashi fan. 

By the way, "Yuki" is not dead, though my muse may be. I know where I want to take the story and even have most of the darned thing mapped out. I just can't put it to words. It's exceedingly frustrating. Hopefully I'll have another chapter of that one up soon.

-Doc


End file.
